Who am I?

I am still dealing with the impact and ramifications of my recent revelation concerning the yoke of Jesus (Matthew 11:28-30). It lead me to write the article concerning same sex attraction (SSA).  It all leads me to one burning question:  Who am I?

For so long I assumed that since I was attracted to men, that I was gay and I had to live that way. I don’t know anymore, as this impact is about as big as when I admitted to myself that I was gay, maybe even bigger.  The media lied.  The LGBT community lied.  Society lied.  Religion lied.  EVERYTHING I had come to believe about myself was a falsehood.  So who am I?

I lived under the yoke of oppression (trying to be something I’m not and trying to fit in) for so long, that all of a sudden my identity is gone.  I am free, but what does that mean?  A new paradigm is forming and my thinking is starting to change.  Who am I?

I am still attracted to men, but I don’t want to have sex with them (turns out I never did). I’m not “cured”, so what happened?  What does all this mean?  WHO AM I ?!?

I am a child of God. Not gay.  Not straight.  Not bisexual.  Not manly.  Not feminine.  Not a fag.  Not queer.  Not butch.  Not religious.  Not rugged.  Not athletic.

I am just me.  I’m still trying to define what that means, but I am me.

Advertisements

2 thoughts on “Who am I?

  1. Not long ago, I found a word that was new to me, “homoromantic.” It’s a word that isn’t heard very often, but it may be what you are feeling. Where “homosexual” emphasizes the “sexual,” “homoromatic” emphasizes the “romantic.” It’s a thing of the heart, not the crotch. Just a thought. I’m not big on labels. The only label that I know for sure that Jesus would approve of and use for you is “friend.” You are His friend.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I don’t like labels either, and as I said in my post, I still am not sure what I am now. “Homoromantic” is as good a definition as any. As far as being a friend of Jesus, I sure wish I hadn’t waited to have a stroke to come back to Him.

    Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s