“The Devil made me do it!”

I really hate it when some religious kook tries to tell why I’m SSA (gay).  Moreover they try to tell me how to be rid of it.  I started showing signs of homosexuality when I was ten, even though I didn’t fully understand it or what was happening.  By twelve, I was actively looking at other guys, though in secret, lest I be found out (the locker room in gym class was a bitch).  By this reckoning, as of this year (2017) I will have been SSA for 35 years (more or less).

Some people try to tell me it was demonically influenced.  If I had already started looking at twelve and experimenting at fourteen, exactly when did I get the “homosexuality demon” inside me?  I never messed with a ouija board or Tarot cards, or anything like that.  I played some Dungeons & Dragons when I was fifteen, but that was the extent of my dabbling in the occult.

To assume a “homosexuality demon” entered me when I was young, and caused me to be gay is essentially saying “the devil made me do it”.  I would have been an innocent pawn, malevolently controlled like a marionette into a life of decadence.  This is all garbage.  I did the things I did by choice.  No demonic apparition influenced me.  At best, one (may) have spoken lies to me when I heard the false sermon that all gays go to hell.  Still, it was I and I alone who made the decision to go into the gay lifestyle.

Similarly, another person on Matt Moore’s site (http://www.moorematt.org/) made the ridiculous suggestion that a demon had entered me each time that I was with a guy and that “all soul ties created with each sexual partner need to be confessed and renounced and then spiritually broken”.  A “soul tie”?  Doesn’t that mean I have to remember each and every single guy I was with and renounce them in order be “cured” of homosexuality?  This is legalism at its best.

I had a stroke four years ago (2012).  I am blessed to have gotten back the memories I have.  Even when I was at full health, I couldn’t remember all of the guys I was with (I estimate about forty).  Some people are in worse off shape than I am if that’s the case (I have a friend who was with about 400 guys).

Jesus Christ paid the price for ALL our sins.  It is a pardon that is freely given to all those who ask!  There is no ritual: no cleansing, no casting out demonic spirits, no public confessions to a priest in a box.  None of any of this religious nonsense.  Also, a person can’t be expected to change overnight.  Just because a recovering alcoholic goes on a binge, it doesn’t mean he doesn’t love the Lord less.  It means he made a mistake.  So too is one who is recovering from a homosexual lifestyle.  I am still attracted to guys.  In this life I will be; it is a part of my biological makeup.  It doesn’t mean I love God less.

It does mean I pray to God for strength, to resist going back into that life.

 

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