All my life I just wanted to be ‘normal’, or be what I perceived as normal.
I think the greatest heroes I ever saw was in The Wizard of Oz: the Scarecrow who only wanted to have a brain; the Tin Man who just wanted to have a heart; and the Cowardly Lion who just wanted courage. We all know the story, and at the end of the movie, each discovered they had these traits all along, and they just needed someone to tell them.
I am normal. I just needed to be shown this. Like most normal men, I confused physical contact with love. I was so caught up about being same sex attracted that I couldn’t see that I was confusing sex with love, and since I was only seeking men, I never found the love that I truly sought. I know that now. I wish that someone had told me before. I miss my uncles, but they really messed me up by not telling me the difference between sex and love.
Perhaps if they had explained the difference to me, I wouldn’t have made all the stupid mistakes in my life.